About Me
Being A Therapist Allows Me To Be My Authentic Self And Use My Natural Gifts
The story of how I became a therapist is an unconventional one. When I was young, I never set my sights on counseling—in fact, I had two seemingly successful careers before I went into counseling.
As a young man, I had a job running a third-world development consulting firm in Nairobi, Kenya. There, I conducted many team-building workshops and used a lot of the concepts and tools I would later use as a therapist. After that, I became an independent film producer in New York City, where I produced seven films and utilized many of the same tools in managing productions and raising funding.
Ultimately, however, both of these careers left me wanting more. Both of them had their rewards but left me feeling like I wasn’t being my authentic self. Once I became a psychotherapist, it was clear I had found the path meant for me all along. For me, nothing is more fulfilling than connecting to others on a deeper level and helping them become who they truly are.
My Counseling Philosophy Is Rooted In The Power Of Love Over Fear
I believe that our lives, our beliefs, and our behaviors are our responsibility and we can transform them if we are willing. Most importantly, I believe that we can choose love over fear. My practice is all about finding love in ourselves and in the world and choosing that over our fears.
I often tell my clients that if they lived in the present, they wouldn’t be feeling anxious. Anxiety does not exist if you are present—it only exists if you are ruminating about the past or fantasizing about the future. This belief aligns with my basic philosophy on life: the only real and meaningful time is the present. If you are truly centered in the moment, it’s easier to stay grounded and direct your focus on loving others and yourself.
What’s more, I believe that at the end of our lives what matters will not be how much money we made or how successful we were, but how we loved. That’s why therapy with me is all about connection—connection to others, connection to spirit, and connection to self.
My Goal In Therapy Is To Help Clients Tap Into Their Unique And Special Gifts
First and foremost, therapy is a relationship. I want my clients to get to know me. I am not a blank wall that my clients project their thoughts and feelings onto—I’m an active participant in their stories. Although I’m a professional, I’m no different than they are. In my own life, I’ve experienced love, connection, and marriage as well as rejection, conflict and divorce. I’ve made my fair share of mistakes and caused pain to others. To be human is to be imperfect and I enjoy sharing the struggles and joys of being human with my clients - our mistakes, wounds, and various failures are our great teachers in life and are part of the earth school curriculum that we all go through.
I am not overly theoretical or clinical. I relate to clients in my own way and I seek to help them feel safe, connected, and understood. Above all, I like to help people tap into their gifts and use them to reach their fullest potential. I believe that all of us have unique and special gifts and talents, but we are not always aware of them. As a young man in Greece, I was raised in a culture where men were supposed to be macho and push their feelings down. It didn’t occur to me that I had a gift for empathy and compassion. That was a gift I recognized later in life.
My goal is to help you figure out what your gifts are. Once this happens, I believe that your direction and purpose in life will become much clearer. You will be able to love more freely and feel more grounded and secure in who you are.
A Little Bit About Who I Am
People often remember me for my sense of humor and sense of adventure. My clients often tell me that I have a gift for explaining concepts and ideas that change the way they think. What’s more, my experience living in many different parts of the world—Greece, Kenya, New York, and now Los Angeles—enables me to relate to many people as a therapist.
Outside of therapy, my greatest accomplishment is that I am a father of three. All three of my children have been successful and are highly emotionally intelligent. I play piano and love music deeply, a love that I have passed down to them, as two of my kids are actively pursuing music. Although I so enjoy that I share my love of film, comedy, exercise , sports and food with my children, what is most important to me is that I support them being unique individuals with their own gifts and interests.
I have been teaching in a Master’s in Psychology Program for 12 years, training adult students to become therapists. My class in non-violent communication has become the most popular class in the program and is now being replicated and offered to undergraduates. My interactive and humanistic style of teaching helps my students rely on their intuition as an integral part of the therapeutic process.
Tom Carouso is a licensed therapist in the South Bay area of greater Los Angeles. He earned his bachelor’s degree in International Relations from Trinity College in 1981 and his Master’s in International Development from American University in 1983. After careers in international development and film production, he received a Master’s in Psychology from Antioch University in 2001.